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Dating Safely

	Disclaimer	We cannot protect you from a broken heart, but we may be able to help you avoid a few of the other risks associated with modern dating. Be sure that you confirm all of our suggestions with your telephone service provider, law enforcement agencies, and other appropriate parties for accuracy - these suggestions are based on the experience of the writer and are not intended to be exhaustive, nor can we guarantee their accuracy.
	The telephone is such a fundamental part of modern dating, it only makes sense to use it intelligently...		Phone Safety
	Rule #1	Be careful who gets your phone number - and don't forget about the fact that virtually everyone has Caller ID. Of course, you can use *67, but with so many folks using anonymous call rejection...
	Get a "special (or personalized) ring" number. This is a phone number that rings differently, but still rings on your current phone line. Why do you need it? Changing your home phone number is a big pain for the friends and family who would just as soon not have to learn a new number every time you break up with someone... The special ring number is the one you give folks you meet - and you can change it later, leaving those folks with a non-working number and not upset your friends and family in the process.		Rule #2
		A slightly more costly alternative is to actually have another "dating" phone line installed - you have the same ability to change your number without upsetting everyone, but you have the added advantage of being able to call someone who is using anonymous call rejection without revealing your home number...
	Understand about call tracing before you need to know about it! Call you telephone service provider to learn the steps you should follow if you receive harassing phone calls. Don't ignore them - even if you choose not to pursue any remedies against the caller, it is important to know your rights, and you may want to establish "a case" just in case...		Rule #3
	E-Mail Safety	Where would we be without e-mail? Think about your personal e-mail account - would you want to have to change it and tell everyone you still want to hear from how to reach you at your new address? Not to mention those free newsletters and other things you have requested.... Your e-mail account is yours, and you want to keep it - free of persistent notes from unwelcome intrusion from someone you don't care to hear from.
	Obviously, you want to have a "dating" e-mail account, much the same as you want a "dating" telephone number! That way when you decide to "shed your skin" you can do so without disrupting the rest of your world.
	Free E-mail	There are a number of free e-mail providers out there, but two to consider are yahoo.com and visto.com - you just sign up and have a new e-mail account in a few minutes! Ask your friends about the free e-mail services they have tried, choose one that sounds good, and use it for early encounters...
	Eventually you will want to meet up with this person with whom you have been exchanging e-mail and telephone conversations - after all, the virtual world is not where you really live!		First Meeting
		Don't make your first meeting a "date" - it is just a first meeting. You want to see if that on line photo looks like "the real thing", check for chemistry, and get a feel for the "real" person - and nothing more!
	Meet them there! Both of you describe how you will be dressed and where in the place you will meet - this makes things a little less awkward...but only a little. Guys should avoid Khaki pants and a blue shirt - half the guys there are probably wearing that very non-original outfit, and you don't want the lady introducing herself to everyone in that uniform! The same thing applies to the ladies - choose something that will help the guy spot you - that first introduction is tough enough without the fear that he is introducing himself to someone who may not be the right lady...		Rule #1
	Rule #2	The place matters. You want to be able to chat without shouting over loud bar chatter or a band - but you also want enough background activity to keep your first meeting from being everyone else's center of attention. Don't go to your favorite hangout - if this doesn't work out, you don't want to have to quit going to your (formerly) favorite place because it has been adopted by someone you would rather not bump into...
	Establish time parameters. "Just meet for a drink" lets everyone involved know that dinner is not part of the plan, and that's important. You can always arrange for a dinner next time, but keep expectations low for your first meeting - that beats dealing with a disappointed face across the table from you. Few things are more awkward than enduring a dinner with someone you do not plan on seeing again....		Rule #3
	Rule #4	Don't lie. "I'll call you" means just that - and if you don't plan on calling, don't promise you will! There is nothing wrong with "Well, I'm glad we finally got a chance to meet" - you haven't committed to meeting again...
	Your auto tag tells all. You have been careful to protect your telephone and e-mail privacy - did you know that with a drive to the Texas Department of Transportation and less than $3 your auto tag data will render your registration info? Oops.		Rule #5
	Conclusion	You can only carry personal privacy so far, and we do not want to encourage a paranoid approach to dating, but you need to realize when you are vulnerable...so that you can make informed decisions regarding how to best achieve the amount of security you want. While many of the people you meet will "not be for you", most of them are probably really great folks (even if for someone else!). It is a shame that we find ourselves living with suspicion of the good folks because of a few weirdoes - but you need to take the steps to reduce the risks so that your dating stories are fun to tell...peculiar clothing choices and bad hair can be funny later, stalkers never are...
	Articles and information appearing in SingleStuff.com simply represent our opinions. We do not pretend to be counselors, psychologists, attorneys or other professionals, and any advice you read here should be taken from that perspective. If you need legal, psychological, medical, or other professional services you should contact an appropriate professional.

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Articles
	Dating Services, Matchmakers, and On-Line Alternatives	We did a little research, and made a few observations. Our opinions on some of the available ways for singles to meet people in the DFW Metroplex.....
	We are convinced that there are a lot of really great single people, and meeting them eventually means dating. The key is to be as safe as possible in the process... This article takes a look at telephone privacy, e-mail security, and some things to think about when you finally meet "face to face".		Dating Safely
	Intimacy	Intimacy is a lot more than just sex - this article takes a look at the "Leave It To Beaver" television family to examine various forms of intimacy.
	You should not make a bunch of compromises or changes in order to "catch a mate", that is dishonest to you and them. On the other hand, if you were to be totally honest, there are some self improvement issues you have been avoiding that would make you happier with yourself - and more attractive to the opposite sex!		It's Broke, So Fix It!!
	Church and Singles	Exactly how does a single person choose a church - by how large the single's group is? Will you really meet a "better" person at church? We have some thoughts you may want to consider....
	You're through licking you wounds from your last breakup, you date until you meet someone great, you go out a while until you discover they are not for you, you break up, and lick your wounds. This takes too long, there has got to be a better way!		Date like You Aren't Going to Live forever
	Finding The Perfect Partner, Having It All In Three Easy Steps	Yeah, right! Have you ever considered that some of the things you are looking for in your "perfect partner" are almost impossible to find in one person - we call them the "incompatibles". Another thought - while you are running around looking for someone who probably does not exist, you are missing your chance to meet someone who does....
	Is it possible that there are "professional singles" who are great at being single, but don't have what it takes to develop long term healthy relationships? Is it possible that they need a constant supply of "fresh meat", naive singles? Is it possible that some singles groups help make this system function?		Single Groundhogs and Their Predators
	It's A Numbers Game... But You Can Improve Your Odds	Let's be realistic - finding the right person for a great relationship is a lot like looking for the proverbial "needle in a haystack" - and settling for less doesn't seem to make much sense either! People with limited options tend to make bad choices, so let's look at some of the ways to improve your odds.
	You know you've asked yourself that question - so, where are they? Bear with us as we take a look at some pretty revealing statistics - then we explore what they mean to a single person looking for a relationship.		Where Are All Of The Good Ones?
	Articles and information appearing in SingleStuff.com simply represent our opinions. We do not pretend to be counselors, psychologists, attorneys or other professionals, and any advice you read here should be taken from that perspective. If you need legal, psychological, medical, or other professional services you should contact an appropriate professional.